how can we cultivate human connection in yoga?

We often see connecting to others as a psychological or mental act. But connection happens at the body level. To connect to another person, we tune our breath, voice, and posture. This tuning is controlled by the endocrine system and the autonomic nervous system and happens outside of our conscious awareness. 

Sue Carter is an internationally recognized expert in the biochemistry of social behavior.  Her husband, Stephen Porges, is the founding director of the Traumatic Stress Research Consortium and the founder of the Polyvagal Theory. Both are distinguished professors in neuroscience. Sue and Stephen gave keynote lectures at The Yoga Therapy Conference in Amsterdam last week. They talked about love, connection, emotional safety and trauma.

Here is what I learned, in a nutshell: i) we all long for connection, ii) connection and love can heal as medicine iii) as yoga teachers and yoga therapists, we can bring more connection into the world. Perhaps it’s the best thing we can do.

humans need connection, attachment and love

Humans have evolved to live in communities.  “Connectedness is a biological imperative. It provides the neurobiological mechanism to link social behavior and both mental and physical health, ” says Stephen.

People without social connection are at risk of various forms of illness. Studies of the elderly show that social support is one of the most important factors in after-stroke recovery. In psychotherapy, common factors such as empathy, warmth, and the relationship between the client and therapist correlate more highly with client outcome than specialized treatment interventions.

I could not help but think about the famous Harvard Study of Adult Development, that tracked a large cohort of people born in the 1930s.  Researchers collected data on their physical and mental health for over 80 years. The results showed that close relationships are what keep people happy throughout their lives. Those ties are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, money, career, or genes.  To flourish, humans need connection, attachment and love.

Love is medicine

Most of what we know about the biology of love comes from research on animals. The neuropeptide called oxytocin facilitates birth, lactation and early nurture in all mammals, including humans. It drives parental behavior, and makes mothers and fathers adore their  babies. 

Oxytocin  is critical for connecting and bonding in both sexes, and in all ages. Increased levels of oxytocin are associated with the feeling of trust, empathy and cooperation. Sue says:  “Oxytocin facilitates a sense of safety. It promotes our capacity to be close to and sensitive to others.”

Love is a complex neurobiological process. Receptors to oxytocin are found in the brain areas responsible for emotions. By acting inside the brain, oxytocin directly reduces fear and anxiety. On top of that, oxytocin works on the autonomic neural system: it downregulates the sympathetic nervous system while supporting the protective and restorative functions of the vagus.  

Oxytocin is more than a “love hormone”. It appears to be one of the key regulatory molecules in the body.  While it is synthesised in the brain, it has a capacity to move throughout the body. Different body systems, including the autonomic nervous system, immune system, bones and gut, are sensitive to oxytocin.  It regulates basic physiological functions such as the balance of electrolytes, gastric motility and eating behavior. Oxytocin can protect the body tissues from stress and inflammation, enabling the body to heal and restore.

Love is medicine.

Yoga: embodied practice of connection

Stephen Porges has coined the term “neuroception” – the unconscious ability to quickly adapt bodily responses to danger or safety. When we detect danger, we shrink and tense, our breathing becomes shallow, our heart beats faster, and our voice pitch becomes higher. On the other hand, when we feel safe, we release muscle tension, soften the breath and the voice, and tune in for connecting with others.  All these changes reflect a shift in the state of the autonomic neural system. 

While these reactions are outside of our awareness, we can consciously use posture, breath, and voice to get to a state of safety. That’s what we do in yoga. Yoga practice gives us a unique way to  reset our physiology to experience safety. Stephen says: “Yoga is a ‘family’ of neural exercises regulating physiological state”.